You’re Not Alone - Over 82% of Men Have Openly Confessed to Being “Stricken With Fear” When They’re Around Women They Desire.
From: Stephen Nash, AKA "Playboy" of Project Hollywood.
On August 5th, 2004, I became the FIRST defection from Project Hollywood, the now infamous "pick-up compound' which was chronicled in Neil Strauss, The Game!
After realizing that "pick-up" was not an effective way to get a girlfriend, I dropped all routines, gimmicks & scripted lines in search of a more empowering, efficient & natural path to dating success.
Please honestly answer the questions below...
Are you tired of being rejected by the women you desire?
Are you sick of feeling like women have "all the power" in the dating scene
and that you have to impress them in order to win their attention?
Or, are you invited to parties and are introduced to a cute girl - or maybe
even set-up on a date with her - only to find yourself stumbling through
"cotton mouth" having no idea what to say or how to even say it?
At the end of a date, do you feel lost when it comes time to kiss her,
eventually awkwardly saying "good night" only to kick yourself later for
not even trying to make a move?
Do you ever feel like you are "less of a man" compared to your friends
because you can't seem or don't know how to get a hot girlfriend?
Have you heard "Let's Just Be Friends" from women more often than
you'd care to admit?
Do you ever feel like the 3rd wheel when you are hanging-out with your best-friend and his girlfriend?
Have you ever secretly desired a woman who was a friend but were too afraid to let her know, forcing you to live through hours, days, even months and years of social pain and frustration when with her, or even worse, when seeing her date other guys who aren't even that cool?
Perhaps you get dates consistently, but you secretly feel that you could "do better" not feeling deeply attracted to the women you are out with?
Have you ever been out with a woman, perhaps to an event or party, only to catch her later-on giving her phone number to another guy, or even worse, leaving the party with him?
Do you secretly feel like you are a failure in life because you cannot attract and keep a beautiful woman into a relationship?
Oh, and are you a bit "overwhelmed" by the massive amount of dating advice online, and are you kinda wierded out by the "pick-up artist" scene?
If you answered "Yes" to just one or more of these questions, then I have some
important news for you...
You're not alone, in fact each of these questions comes straight out of my story.
I lived each of these at some point in my past, and through my personal research of women and dating, I have discovered that there are MANY guys who were just like me... before I discovered that there was an answer to this extremely painful reality.
In fact, in this day & age, this list of questions is NORMAL!
I have personally worked with, spoken to, emailed back & forth with and coached nearly one thousand men who experience pain, frustration, loneliness and downright hopelessness with women on a daily, and sometimes HOURLY basis.
When I was at my "bottom" a few years back, I had reached a point of secretly hating women - they were responsible for my pain, my frustration, my loneliness...
It is a TERRIBLE place to be man.
"I Was Convinced That The "Attractive Women" Of The World Had Mutually Decided That I Was Not Cool, Attractive Or "Enough" For Them And That They Should Never Talk To, Date, Kiss, Have Sex, Or End Up In A Relationship With ME!"
Sort of absurd isn't it?
Well, this is the result of deep-seeded insecurity & years of downright terror felt around women...That produces some pretty irrational thinking doesn't it?!!
Of course there was never any meeting between these women.... want to know the real story?
Most women never even noticed me.
I was the kind of guy who faded into the scenery, never spoke up, never let his desires and wishes known, and never followed the Nike slogan of..."Just Do It" ever, never, ever, never, ever, never, ever...
Until I had felt enough pain, that is. Sadly, that was the case for me.
Here's the "pickle" I found myself in:
On the one hand, I was desperate for companionship, connection and that feeling of..."I am a man, because I have a woman with me"...
Biologically, I now know that the desire for companionship is healthy and GOOD.
But on the other hand, I was so "body-shaking" terrified of the women that could give me that feeling that I would only date women who couldn't!
Does that make sense? The only women who could bring me that awesome feeling of attraction and connection were the VERY women I was afraid of!
So, when I dated, it would usually be with women I was "lukewarm" towards AT BEST...as those were the only ones I felt comfortable with!
And even then, I would often go 6 months between dates.
On Average, From The Ages Of 18-31, I Would Date
Two New Women Per Year... You Read That Correctly,
Two New Women Per Year!
That's it - and those would be women who either approached me, or with whom I was set-up with by a friend.
Never was it a woman I approached or otherwise pursued socially.
Never was it a woman who I saw and felt that physical sensation of attraction for... that gut-warming feeling of "YES... I want HER".
No - the women who created that feeling in me, I actually ran from - They terrified me...
These are not good numbers for a guy who wanted a girlfriend...and not just any girlfriend...but a beautiful, intelligent, witty, cool, sexy, ambitious & adventurous woman that I could spend my life with.
Between you and me, I never really enjoyed the whole "dating game" even when I was good at it.
I mean, the "scene" is a LOT of work.
So, I've never been one who's drawn to the bachelor lifestyle... I have always known that my goal in life is to meet "That One Special Girl" to settle down and have a family with.
But, in order to do that, I had to increase those numbers. I mean, two new women per year is NO WAY to search for a great woman...
It's Living By The Law Of LUCK, And Great Women
Are Not Attracted To Guys Who WAIT For Life To
Give Them What They Truly Desire.
The first thing I realized was that it wasn't MY FAULT. You see, no one taught me about women. No one taught me about social skills, dating or sex.
In short, I had never been taught about what it means to be a GUY. Know what else? Hardly ANYONE is! I was definitely not alone in that. When I discovered that, man, I was relieved.
Want to know something? It wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be, once I stopped making some critical, deadly, attraction-annihilating mistakes.
What's so interesting to me is that, now that I help guys with their women and dating challenges, AND now that I am in a loving, long-term relationship (yep, you heard me correctly - I have come full circle), I can see that MOST guys make these miscues when dealing with women.
If you do even one of these, you will OFTEN lose her attraction for you forever. Particularly if you've just met her, or are on your first date, these are super-duper-toxic-deadly:
Never try to "buy" her affection and interest with dinners, gifts, flowers and other ridiculous displays of "affection."
Never lavish her with compliments in hopes that she will "like" you because you are so positively attentive & "romantic."
Never seek her approval or permission over your own or always do"nice" things like call her every day to see how she is doing, laugh at all her jokes, approve of everything she says & does, force her to take-over the dating dynamic causing her to become...THE MAN.
Never give away your POWER to women by trying to get her to "like" you by doing whatever she wants, seeking her validation in all things great & small, and being hesitant, meek & timid at those all-important "escalation" moments like, when it's time to get her number, establish a bit of kino, or go for the first kiss.
This is a recipe for DISASTER. Does it surprise you to know that women are not attracted to "nice guys"?
Nope - not even close. In fact, quality women are REPELLED by these behaviors because they can sense the weakness and neediness behind them.
And here you thought you were just being a "nice guy"...
Women see right through it man, and that is a major reason why you are struggling
in the dating game.
The problem is that from YOUR point of view - you ARE being a nice guy - but from her point of view (which is the one that matters here), you are weakly and trying to get her to "like" you.
Why are most quality women turned off by this?
Attractive women are approached, wined, dined and advanced on by MANY guys...in fact, the VERY attractive women are "hit-on" often over 10 times per DAY. (Can you imagine?)
The reason they don't respond to this is because it is INSULTING and MANIPULATIVE.
Also, they don't WANT to approach you, lead the conversation, have you laugh at all their jokes, pick-out the restaurant, or make the move to kiss you...no, they want & expect you to do that.
What do women want from you? FEELINGS. These feelings are not dependant upon your fancy car, watch or "stuff" nor is it dependant upon how "nice" you are.
What are some of these feelings?
- Dominance
- Humor
- Fun
- Being "Heard"
- Comfort
- Trust
- Security
- Attraction
To name a few.
Quality women are not willing to settle for anything less than a MAN who can naturally provide these emotions to her on a regular basis.
Men Who Can Do That Are Naturally Attractive to Women!
And here's a bit of good news: This can be LEARNED. I did it, and so can you.
To become attractive to women, and to stop making these mistakes, you are going to have to make some changes, and the first step is to get HELP with making those changes.
Listen, cultivating new empowering "outer" behaviors & skills like "flirting" or "approaching" or "connecting" or "escalating" with women can be hard work all on your own... in order to speed up your process, you're going to need a little (eh-hem) assistance.
Also, you're going to need to address the needy, insecure parts of your personality and develop more "inner" confidence, self-esteem and power.
So, there are really two areas you're going to need to address:
1) Your INNER Game
2) Your OUTER Game
The fastest way to success is to address BOTH your "inner game" and your "outer game" at the same time.
By working on both simultaneously, you will:
Cultivate confidence (inner game), and begin naturally meeting more women (outer game)
Start fe eling "attractive" (inner game), and start creating "attraction" in
women (outer game)
Know you DESERVE a healthy relationship (inner game), and magnetize healthy women to you (outer game
Have you ever heard of Neil Strauss' The Game? Well, I was featured in
that
book...as "Playboy" (don't laugh, but that was my old nickname.)
Well, we were so focused on "outer game" techniques for picking-up women, and totally clueless about "inner game" skill that we could attract women left and right, but couldn't keep them in our lives.
They would see that we were fun, engaging, and attractive - but buried deep down within each of us, we were still each insecure.
None of us were dealing with the "inner" challenges we were hiding with all of our "outer" skill...it was imbalanced, incomplete, and ultimately unfulfilling.
Most guys want to feel attractive, cool, social power, status, acceptance & love - right?
So, I set to work on finding a balanced yet FAST way to capitalize all of what I learned at "Project Hollywood" (the 'pick-up' artist mansion I helped co-found that is covered in Neil's book) with "inner game" technique and development that would work in the real world.
I Realized That There Were 7 Fundamental Skills That
Any Guy Can Learn - To Enhance His Dating Life & To Experience More Success With Attractive Women.
I researched by observing "naturals" - guys who didn't appear to be working at their social lives, and yet seemed to have massive success with women.
These guys were massively confident and secure around women. They never seek approval from the opposite sex, and yet they are also very COOL guys...
Not once did I see one behave like an asshole. They simply had an "it" factor that women go NUTS for.
What surprised me was that most of what these "natural" guys were doing was so subtle and yet so simple.
It was more about how they were LIVING than how they were behaving with the women in their lives.
Their Lives Naturally Validated Them, So They No Longer Had To Seek Validation From WOMEN.
Interesting, isn't it?
Seeking validation or approval from women is the taproot of the disease of neediness & insecurity, which is the "Number 1 - Numero Uno" challenge that guys face who are not successful with women.
Remember those 5 miscues I mentioned previously?
They are the chief SYMPTOMS of this disease.
See, most guys incorrectly think that all they need are social skills to better "approach" & "attract" women. That is sometimes true, but not NEARLY enough to cross the goal line.
As I said, I've put all these learnings and techniques into an ebook called How To Get A Girlfriend, and in it I reveal these 7 skills and provide "cutting-edge" exercises for you to do so you can quickly learn them too.
Though I do give you specific things to say to women that WORK (to get you started) such as "openers" (LOTS of openers), many examples of "flirting", "teasing" & "baiting", a number of awesome stories to use, escalation techniques, topics to use (and topics to AVOID at all costs), ways to build the connection, a foolproof way to get her phone number...etc...
True power and choice with women comes when you OWN social skills, NOT when you've memorized zillions of "things to say" - that's just a step along the road to real mastery.
LIFE skills are needed for relationships. Social Skills, although mandatory learning for every guy, are only a piece to a much larger picture. They are vehicles for conveying the INNER game.
There's a ton more, but as you read these remember - these are given to you with a PLAN behind them.
What is the goal of that plan?
POWER & CHOICE.
OK, so that's two goals...each vitally important and totally DESERVED by all guys.
My goal for you is to feel the power of choice and the freedom from anything unnatural and manipulative when dealing with women.
When your momma said "Just Be Yourself"...well, she was RIGHT - only she didn't teach you HOW.
The HOW is with INTELLIGENCE and POWER, and that's what I teach you in
How To Get A Girlfriend.
Empowering you with social skills and confidence is the only way for you to feel the freedom to be yourself and to be the most attractive and powerful version of yourself.
Get that?
That's a plan for real-life success.
If you are the kind of guy who wants to naturally meet more women, who wants phone numbers of more women, who wants to date more women, who wants more options of VERY attractive women, who wants to feel more self-esteem and more confidence in life and in dating, and who eventually wants to meet a VERY special woman and attract her into a relationship...then How To Get A Girlfriend is THE book for you.
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