It’s a surprising challenge, but it’s very, very common. MANY men get into conversations with women, but haven’t the slightest clue how to “close” the interaction with an exchange of telephone numbers.
Here is my experience with this challenge, and what I discovered as the single BEST way to ask for her phone number.
I would find myself in a conversation with a woman, and it would be going really well. So, she would be laughing, smiling and listening. A guy gets a feeling in his gut which tells him clearly that “she’s into me” (learning to trust that is another story…more on that later though). Now, in my case, I would get NERVOUS, fearing that I would blow it when it came time for the all-important “close”.
Guess what? It would become a self-fulfilling prophesy. I would get so nervous, that I would flub the end of the conversation, often never asking for her phone number or, if so, asking in such a wrong way that it would reverse attraction and negate the good vibe…terrible, but true.
Know what else? I’ve found through my work with guys, that this happens A LOT. It’s common…
Here is the solution I found. This may flow against a lot of what I teach as dating advice, but in this case, it’s important.
I created a canned line that I could ALWAYS use in these situations so that I wouldn’t have to think of what to say, and how to say it. I then rehearsed this line so that it would smoothly flow off of my tongue when summoned. Here’s the line:
“How can we continue this conversation when we both have more time?”
Also, I would normally precede this with something specific and ‘local’ to the conversation. So, something like:
- “Wow, I did not expect to have such an interesting conversation at this party”
- Had I known I would laugh this hard at this opening tonight I would’ve gotten here early”
- “I did NOT think I would have such a fun chat at Barnes & Noble today – what a great surprise”
So, whatever seems OBVIOUS in the particular conversation you are in, go ahead and use it – to be followed-up by my ‘line’.
Why is this important? Well, if you are anything like me, when something is on the line, you might get a little nervous – particularly early on. So, it behooves you to give yourself a little ‘help’ at that moment by memorizing my words above.
Why is this such a great line? Well, it accomplishes asking her out WITHOUT using the words “go out” in any way. Very attractive women are asked out a LOT, and this sounds different to the ear thus negating any auto-pilot responses they may have. Also, by saying it in this way, you are acknowledging the fact that you have to GO. You can’t sit there with her all night and keep talking, but that you must return to whatever it was you were doing before she came along. In other words, your life is important to you.
Trust me, this is big. It goes deeply into a lot of my core concepts about ’security’ and in being ‘attractive’ to the right kinds of women. Very, very key.
Once you say these words, expect then to exchange numbers with her. It’s best to input her number into yours and then call her from your phone – this way you are sure you’ve input it correctly and that she now has your number too so she will know who is calling.
A final question answered – what if she offers email? Go for it. In fact, I’ve had just as strong success with email as I have had with phone numbers. I don’t see any problem with it. I also hate using the telephone as I cannot read the other’s reaction to what I am saying. Email is easier, and if that’s what she offers, go for it.
Ultimately, if she’s into you, she will answer her phone or return your call. If she’s into you, she will write you back when you email her. It matters nothing how you reach out to her – neither improves your chances at all. By now, the attraction is there…or it isn’t.
So, learn that line above, and USE IT in your next interaction – it’s a solid and smooth way to get a girls number. Allow it to be a bridge from a great talk to a smooth ‘close’ to the conversation.
If you would like to learn even more from me, meet more women, get tons of dates and eventually get a really great girlfriend (in 7 simple, intuitive steps), you’ve gotta check out my eBook “How To Get A Girlfriend”.
You can download your copy right here and you don’t even have to pay for it now. It comes with a 7-day free trial, so you can test drive the material before you commit your $20 (a STEAL!):